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Putting your baby back to sleep 5 or 6 times a night? Second guessing motherhood? Resenting your snoring husband while your baby is screaming? Join Katie Pitts, certified pediatric sleep consultant and learn how to help your whole family get a better night's sleep.
How can i teach my 17 month old who still breastfeeds and sleeps with me to sleep on her own without crying? I'm a single mom and by the time its timw to sleep the last thing I can manage is her crying. Help, I miss my sleep.
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Katie P.
Hi Margarita. Unfortunately, there isn't an easy quick answer here...and this question goes beyond our simple Q&A; however, that doesn't mean there isn't a solution. You will have to commit to a few long nights but by night 3, you should have a great little sleeper. You will want to pick some type of sleep training method that you feel comfortable with and stick to it 100%. Here is a resource guide with some of my best tips to help you get started: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-download/ |
My almost 4 month old has been a great sleeper and was sleeping 8:30-7:30 by 8 weeks. In the last week, though, she's been waking around 3:30 every night. I've been feeding her because it's the easiest way to get her back to sleep without waking her older sister but now I'm afraid I've created a habit. What things can I do to get her back to sleeping through? Thanks!
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Katie P.
Hi Mary Kate. What is your bedtime routine? |
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Mary Kate Hi Katie, |
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Katie P.
It sounds like she is starting to rely on some sleep props to fall asleep. A sleep prop is anything external your baby uses to fall asleep and stay asleep - this can be nursing, rocking, bottle, patting, etc. If she is relying on a prop to fall asleep, she will need that prop replaced in the middle of the night to go to sleep. I would switch your routine: Feeding, diaper/PJs, book and into the crib. If she starts crying, you will want to have a plan on ways to soothe but not put her to sleep. Consistency will be key - 100% of the time. If you need help with this process and want to get your 12 hour sleeper back, I'd be happy to discuss some ways that I can help during a free evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
My almost 6mo old basically sleeps through the night, but lately has been waking anywhere between 5-6am. Desired wake time is 7am. How can I help her sleep closer to 7am? Her bedtime is anywhere from 6-7pm based on how she napped that day and her wake times. Do I just leave her until the desired wake time? She will start off "talking" and babbling but will end up crying. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
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Katie P.
Hi Colleen. What is your bedtime routine? What do her naps look like during the day? |
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Colleen Bedtime routine: bottle or nurse around 6pm, bath (some nights), then Jammie's and bedtime. We lay her down wide awake. Sometimes she cries and sometimes she will just fuss a minute. Her naps have been tough. About an hour at most and often waking after 30-40 minutes. We try and do crib hour but she is rarely falling back to sleep and then I feel she is more tired and cranky when I get her up. I try to put her down for a nap after she has been awake for 1.75-2 hours. She is currently going for 3 naps but I'm wondering if it's getting close to 2 nap time? |
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Katie P.
Yes Colleen - You are right. She is getting close to needing 2 naps. A baby this age can typically handle 2.5 to 3 hours of wake time so push up the wake time and you should instantly start seeing longer naps! Everything else looks beautiful. Put her down for bed 3 hours after her last nap...that will ensure she is not overtired and she will start sleeping later in the morning. |
Hello! Our 7 month old seems to have hit some sort of sleep regression. She's always been a terrific sleeper (7:30pm-7am ish, straight) but recently started getting up around 4am and/or multiple times a night - which she NEVER did before. We also travelled now for the holidays and getting her to sleep in the travel crib is challenging. She will only sleep in our arms. Once we go back home we will have to be stricter about this but right now we don't want her waking up the whole house. Help? Thank you!
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Katie P.
Hi Claudia. Is there a chance she is getting overtired by missing naps throughout the day? What does her nap schedule look like? |
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Claudia Her naps are all over the place. More or less one around 9am then 12pm and 3pm... they last anywhere from 30 minutes to 1.5hrs but mostly they are short. Not sure how to adjust them... |
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Katie P.
It's hard to make any changes when traveling, especially because you want to be considerate of others. My best travel advice is to stay consistent - if that's the baby sleeping in your arms, then stick consistent with it. If you are having her sleep in a travel crib, keep consistent with that and just do what you need to do to survive until you get home. A 7 month old can handle around 3 hours of wake time so make sure she is going down for a nap or bed no longer than 3 hours later. Once you get home, I would get right back on track with consistency - making sure that she is falling asleep on her own in her own bed and before you know it, you will have your great sleeper back! If you need help teaching her these healthy sleep habits again, I'd be happy to discuss some sleep packages with you during a free evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
Welcome Katie Pitts from Sleep Wise Solutions! Katie is here to help you get your babies and toddlers to sleep better. She will be answering the first 40 questions so ask early!
Hi! My 4 mth old sleeps straight through the night like 9-7 but he hardly naps. He might cat nap for 10-15 min if he falls asleep eating but our pediatrician said he needs 2-4 hrs of sleep during the day. I've tried his crib, Rock n play, sleep suit. But he just doesn't stay asleep. Pediatrician said to put him down in his crib and let him cry for up to 45 min. I worry when I do this and he cries like 10 min in that it's because he has to burp so he's not going to fall asleep if he's uncomfortable but if I go in and burp him he's wide awake and just screams after. Help!
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Katie P.
Hi AK. Your little guy sounds a lot like mine used to at this age! It's very frustrating to not have any breaks throughout the day and on top of it, you have a tired little guy. I agree with your pediatrician that some type of nap training is necessary. There are other options besides cry it out - I'm actually not a huge fan of cry it out, especially at this age. I would pick a sleep training method you feel comfortable with and stick to it 100%. Within a few days, your little guy should be napping like a champion! If you need help with this, I'd be happy to discuss some ways that I can help during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
Oh and one more thing! My 4 month old goes to bed around 8 pm and keeps waking up around 5 am. She's someone's able to resettle herself, but any tips to avoid that? (I can't get back to sleep at that time even when she does!). Thank you!
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Katie P.
Please add this question to your previous question thread. |
My two-month-old sometimes thrashes like crazy after we put him down. He will eventually fall asleep but it's hard to watch/listen to.
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Katie P.
Hi Nicole. Can you describe the thrashing? |
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Nicole He turns his head wildly back and forth, throws his legs on the air (he is swaddled), and makes loud unhappy sounds that aren't crying. |
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Katie P.
Before putting him down in his bed, make sure that he is getting out any extra burps or gas. A great way to do this is to bicycle his legs and also lay him down flat and then pull the top half of him up like you would with a sit up. If he is free from extra air, then he is likely just a noisy little self-soother and that is completely normal :) Newborns are noisy little people and many of them like to fall asleep to a grunting noise or move themselves about until they are comfortable. If he isn't crying, he is likely just trying to figure out his new sleep skills and as he gets older, the thrashing will greatly improve. |
Hi Katie!
My 14 month old twins are generally great sleepers. Lately they've been waking 1-2 hours earlier in the morning screaming (5-6am) whereas they used to wake up happy. Typically one wakes up screaming and when I go in to get her, the other one wakes right up and then we have two awake babies who won't go back to sleep. I think teething is the cause though they're always happy when they're awake. I'm struggling with not only the early wake ups but the inability to get them back down to sleep that early (and ultimately waking each other up). Today's 5am wake up had them napping at 8:30am and the whole day is screwy! Thanks!
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Katie P.
Hi Janel. Are they still taking 2 naps? What does their daily schedule typically look like? |
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Janel Yes still taking 2 naps/day - on a good day, they'll get up happy at 7am, nap 10-11:30, again maybe 2:45-4:15, then bed at 7pm. They go down without a fight typically. One is cutting a tooth (which mean the other will follow about a week later!) which is why I'm blaming teething and hysterically screaming when they wake up lately. Naps they wake up happy most of the time these days (not all, like yesterday when one woke up screaming after 45 min and I was somehow able to magically sneak in and get her out without waking the other who took a 2.5 hour nap!) |
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Katie P.
I typically see this early waking around this age when babies are ready to transition to 1 nap. You can wait it out 1 more week to make sure it's not truly teething and, if you are still seeing this pattern, I would make the switch to 1 nap a day. Here is an article to help with the transition: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/article-02/ |
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Janel Thanks :) I considered 1 nap, but its just so uncharacteristic of either of them to wake up screaming. The other problem is that it's 99% of the time one twin waking up, while the other would happily continue to sleep. I'm hesitant to drop a nap because it doesn't seem like they're both ready (and there's no way I can have two babies on 2 nap schedules or even napping in different rooms!). Hopefully this is a teething related phase that's coming to an end! Thanks! |
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Katie P.
Can you try temporarily moving one twin out of the room so they don't wake the other? Keep in mind this will only be a temporary 1 week solution before either things go back to normal or you make the transition. |
My baby is 4 months. Any tips for teaching her how to fall asleep and stay asleep unswaddled? She loves to chew on her fingers throughout the day so I think it would help her resettle during the night. Should I start with naps or when she's tired at night? One arm out hasn't worked but I could keep trying. Also I do not want to use the Merlin sleep suit or anything else. I'd like to go straight to the sleep sac as I did for my other babies. Thank you!
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Katie P.
Hi Sarah. You are right at this age to get rid of the swaddle. It actually can become dangerous because babies will start to roll. At 4 months, my best advice is to get rid of it cold turkey. You will want to start with bedtime and continue with naps the next day. |
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Sarah Ok, I will try! She also has been waking up between 4:30 and 5. At first I was using a pacifier to get her back to sleep and now she is able to resettle by herself, but she often wakes me up. Is this the best I can hope for in that I don't have to settle her, or is there a change I should make that will prevent her from waking up? I usually put her to bed awake and cooing (or complaining) and she puts herself to sleep. |
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Katie P.
Sounds like you are on the way to some wonderful healthy sleep habits! If you do not have to go back in to resettle her, that's wonderful. Eventually that waking will go away. What is your bedtime routine? Does she have a nap schedule during the day? |
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Sarah Before bed she eats, then I hold her upright for nearly an hour as she's a big spitter, then I swaddles her, turn out the lights and put on the sound machine and sing some songs and bounce for about 5 mins and I put her in her crib. She wakes around 7 and I stick to no more than 2 hours awake at a time so she usually naps 9-11 and 1-2 or 3. I struggle with the late afternoon because if she wakes up at 3 or later, she's sleepy around 5, which is too late for a nap but too early for bed. Sometimes I get her to cat nap on me, but she's my third so it's a tough time of day! What is your advice about that third nap? If it's 4 or 4:30 and she's sleepy, I'll swaddle her and try to give her a nap but it doesn't always work. Thank you so much! |
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Katie P.
Hi Sarah! Everything looks great. Try simplifying your routine a little by putting her down in the crib a little sooner with less bouncing so she can fully settle herself. That will help her early morning party hours. For this age, a cat nap at the end of the day is very common (30-45 minutes). If she refuses a crib nap at this time, you would try putting her in a carrier or swing for a little rest while you tend to your other little ones. |
Hi Katie,
My daughter is around 2.9 years and has been waking up in the middle of the night screaming about something for the past few weeks. I am not sure if its nightmares or night terrors but she doesn't seem to be awake. She will just start screaming "No, no, I don't want to...." Sometimes its something that happened that day like she didn't want us to turn off a tv show at noon and then at 3am she is screaming it and other times we cannot figure out what she is saying. Sometimes she is still laying down and others she is sitting straight up but her eyes are still closed. We have let it go and she has fallen back to sleep for the night and other times it happens 4-5 times a night. Some of the parents have suggested keeping a journal so i can try to figure out what is causing it which I have but I am not seeing a pattern just yet. Should I try to clam her and risk waking her or do I leave her be? Any suggestions on what this could be and how to deal with it would be great! Thanks!
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Katie P.
Hi Paula. Night terrors are different from nightmares in both the experience and symptoms. When a child is experiencing a night terror, she may scream and appear anxious and often not recognize you when you approach her. She could be sweating and have a racing heartbeat. The child is often inconsolable. The terror typically lasts between 5-15 minutes and then subsides. It’s typically more upsetting for the parent than the child because the child does not usually remember them. These can occur if your little one is working on a developmental milestones. Your toddler is also more likely to have night terrors if either parent had them or a partial arousal sleep disorder such as sleep walking. The most common cause is sleep deprivation. Traveling to a new time zone, moving to a new home, sleep apnea, fevers or a later bedtime can also be a cause. |
My 5 month old is having a real hard time falling asleep and staying asleep at night. He is also not a great napper during the day. He probably only gets about 7 hours at night with frequent awakenings. He is recovering from a nasty bout of RSV and has been very congested and coughing for the past few weeks. Also he is on the smaller side, so I always nurse him when he wakes up so as to not deprive him the nutrition I think he needs. Thanks for your advice!
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Katie P.
Hi Shruti. It's possible to still teach your little one healthy sleep habits while allowing feedings at night. You will want to wait until he is healthy before you begin. Having a bedtime routine and ensuring that your little guy is not overtired will be a great place to start. Here is a link to download some of my best tips: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-download/ |
My 18 month old cosleeps and we have a new baby due in 2 weeks or less. Is it too late to move him to his own bed? If not what's the best way to move him? And he also takes forever to fall asleep we lay down with him. Any tips on getting him down faster. Thank you.
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Katie P.
Hi Zandra. Ensuring that he has a good schedule is a great place to start. A wonderful schedule for an 18 month old is 7:00 am wake up, 12:00 - 2:00/3:00 nap, bedtime at 7:30. If the baby is coming in less than 2 weeks, I would either start TONIGHT to make sure he has enough time to adjust to his new sleeping space or wait to move him to his own bed because you do not want him to feel like he is being replaced by the new baby within a few days. I would wait until the baby has been home for a month or so and then make a big deal about your little guy getting his own room and own crib. Make sure that you stick 100% consistent. So if he needs to fall asleep in his own bed, it's important that he stays in his own bed the whole night. Here are some tips to help you get started: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-download/ |
What are recommended wake times for a 10.5 month old? Wakes around 7 and first nap is still 2 hours after. But then she only naps 30-40 minutes and then Goes 3-4 hours before 2nd nap and then goes 5 hours before bed. I have heard if they wake at 645, they should go to ned at 645, so i make sure she is in bed 12 hours from wake time. Idk what to do about erratic schedule. I have tried to get her on one but does not seem to wirk bc she has short naps but sleeps 10-11 at night
Wakes to eat and sleeps another 1-2
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Katie P.
Hi Katrina! An ideal schedule for a 10.5 would be: |
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Katrina I wish an 1.5 hour nap |
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Katrina But i just don't think i will ever get to a 230 afternoon |
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Katie P.
What is your naptime routine? What has to happen at bedtime and naptime in order for her to fall asleep? |
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Katrina Naptime i just lay her down when i see rubbing eyes and yawning |
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Katrina What happens most days is she takes three 1/2 naps |
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Katie P.
Your nap time routine looks great. Lengthening the awake times should do the trick. If you try extending the wake times and don't see any improvement with nap lengths, I'd be happy to discuss this further with you during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
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Katrina Ok will try but she cannot seem to make it and redirection does not work :( |
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Katie P.
It's always a hard push at first but going outside, playing with a new toy, offering a snack are all great ways. If she is having a really hard time, try extending it by 15 minutes every 3 days until she gets to your desired awake time. Stick with it - it will be worth it when she takes nice long naps! |
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Katrina Sounds good |
Hello! Our 7mo daughter was a relatively great sleeper until she got a terrible cold and cough from daycare at 6months and simultaneously started rolling onto her tummy at night. She panics on her tummy and isn't able to roll from tummy to back so screams about half of the time, the other half she goes back to sleep.
She goes to bed by 7pm. Our nights typically have at least a few wake ups starting around midnight. It's completely unpredictable, and many times she is up on her arms, looking trapped on her tummy, wailing at the top of her lungs. Then she wakes up at 4, whimpers for an hour/wakes up and falls asleep until 5am when I feed her. I nurse her to back sleep and then she wakes for the day at 715.
The past few days she has been waking up at 1130 pm screaming bloody murder for an hour or more. We're at my in-laws for the next week with many relatives and small children. :/
We haven't sleep trained her out of this phase because it never seems to be the right time. Her nose is constantly blocked with the cold so she can't breathe, her coughs are really bad and wake her up, and she sometimes HATES her tummy and can't roll over from it, plus she hasn't gotten any teeth yet so we never know is she may be teething or not.
When/how do we sleep train knowing this will be a baby that will cry for hours unless we soothe her, that she is still sick and likely will be for the foreseeable future (daycare), and teething is hovering in the near future?
And in the meantime, what do we do to survive to the next week/few weeks?
Thank you!
Ps I only nurse her to sleep at the 5am feed. She is 50th percentile for height and weight. She sleeps in a sleep sack in her own room and we put her down with a wubanub which she can put in her own mouth at night. We have a white noise machine, blackout curtains, and a humidifier.
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Arow And she takes 2-3 naps during the day. She either goes right to bed or cries for 20 mins |
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Katie P.
Hi Aimee. Okay - first, as far as the rolling, the best thing to help with this is to practice practice practice! Have tummy time and practice rolling both ways at least 10 minutes 3 times per day. Once she can roll both ways, things will get easier. You are right that you don't want to sleep train her when she is sick. Find (or make) a time when you have at least 2 weeks of as much normal activity as possible and start the sleep training process. You will want to pick a sleep training method you feel comfortable with and stick with it 100%! The hardest thing you can do for a baby is have them cry for a long period of time and then go in and soothe them to sleep - it's conditions the baby to cry a very long time to get what she wants, which is an unfair message to give her. If you need help with the sleep training process, I'd be happy to talk about some ways that I can help during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
Hi Katie!
I have two semi-related questions. My 5 month old was a pretty good sleeper up until when I went back to work. She would sleep 3 hours in between feedings. When I went back to work (about 3 months) she started waking up multiple times starting at 3:30am-6am. It got better, but got worse again since she hit 4 months. We have a bedtime routine that starts between 7 and 9pm depending on her cues. Sometimes after daycare she will start to melt down around 6 or 6:30pm. She has had some odd nights where she has slept through the night, but I could count them on one hand.
Secondly, I've had her in a rock and play next to my bed, but I've been trying to transition her to her crib in a failed attempt on the weekends for the past couple months. I've tried a crib wedge and a sound soother. But, she won't sleep in the crib longer than an hour. When she wakes up it's not necessarily for food she falls asleep when I pick her up. If I put her back in the crib she just screams. She has been waking up between 2:30-3:30am and end up just holding her in my recliner to help her sleep. We either stay in the recliner or I return her to the rock and play (which she is growing out of).
She will sleep in a pack and play flat for naps, but she still wakes up in 45 min- an hour. She has taken longer naps, but on a softer mattress under a watchful eye. I don't want to co sleep, but I feel like that might be my future if I can't get this resolved.
Any suggestions for a tired Mama? Thanks!
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Katie P.
Hi Jacki. It sounds like your little girl is relying on quite a few sleep props A sleep prop is anything external a baby uses to fall asleep and stay asleep. This can be nursing, bottle, rock n play, rocking, patting, or even something as simple as playing with mommy's fingers until she falls asleep. In order to get her sleeping 12 hours throughout the night and taking 3 solid naps during the day in her crib, you will want to start putting her down for bed 100% wide awake so she can develop her own sleep skills. It will take time and consistency - remember this is a brand new skills we are teaching her but once she gets it, it's amazing to watch her fall asleep and sleep so well :) If you need help teaching her healthy sleep habits, I'd be happy to discuss some ways that I can help during a free 15 minute consultation: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
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Jacki Yes she plays with my fingers too! That's what she was doing this morning at 2:30am before I picked her up! |
Is there an ideal age to transition my 3-month old into his own crib and own room? Should it be done in stages (first crib in my room, then crib in his own room) or all at once? I wouldn't mind bedsharing until 6 months or so, but I'm afraid the transition will be harder then. I also don't want to do it now and then have to retrain after the 4-month regression. Thanks!
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Katie P.
Hi Nan. What is he currently sleeping in? It's much easier to transition if he is on a flat service like a bassinet rather than a rock n play. |
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Nan He sleeps in bed with me at night and mostly in a rock and play for naps. |
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Katie P.
I would transition all at one time - to his crib in his own room. That will be the quickest way to get him sleeping well. If you are okay with how things are, you can wait until 6 months but typically, the earlier you start, the easier the transition because they have had less time to develop bad habits. If you teach your little one healthy sleep habits, you should slide right through the 4 month sleep regression as well. If you need help making these transitions, I'd be happy to discuss some ways that I can help during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
Hi,
My daughter is 2 months old. She sort.of has her own schedule but is very unpredictable with both her feeds (breastfed) and her sleep/naps. Some days she'll take a 2 hour nap but most days she'll nap for about an hour a few times a day but only if held. I swaddle her and try a pacifier but usually she doesn't take it. At night we do a bath around 7pm and then she pretty much continuously breastfeeds/pacifies until midnight. She sleeps in a bassinet next to my bed swaddled. Then she wakes about every 2.5-4 hours to feed. She frequently doesn't wake for the day until 9 or 10am. I'm fine with this, however, I'll be going back to work soon and she'll be starting daycare shortly after that. Is there anything else I should do to help her establish an erier bedtime and facilitate naps while not being held? Thank you!
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Katie P.
Hi Cassandra. It's never too early to start teaching healthy sleep habits. At this age, I don't typically recommend to allow much crying but you can still work towards getting your little girl to fall asleep by herself. Ideally, she should be sleeping 12 hours throughout the night (with 1 or 2 feeds) and then taking 3-4 naps a day that last 1-3 hours. Try following an eat-play-sleep schedule, rather than allowing her to eat right before sleeping situations. If you need help beyond this, I'm happy to discuss some other strategies I teach in my newborn plan during a free evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
Hello! My two year old still breastfeeds on demand and co-sleeps, which is not ideal but I'm not trying to change this yet. However, her sleep times have gotten progressively more unpredictable and later and later- she has always fallen asleep on the late side (as late as 11 waking at 9 or so). For a while she was skipping naps altogether and getting to sleep at a somewhat "normal" time, but now she needs naps again yet can be awake for 8 hours before settling down, then 6 after nap, which means she can be awake from 8 to 12! Any tips/advice?
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Katie P.
Hi Melissa. I would work on sticking with a consistent schedule. Ideally at this age, a toddler should wake around 7:00, nap from 12:30 - 2:00 and be in bed by 8:00. If she is a later riser, you could try moving everything back for an hour or so. If she is not ready to fall asleep at that nap time, she still should have a rest. If she refuses the nap and naptime is over, instead of a later naptime, do an early bedtime, moving it up a full 2 hours is okay. |
I have two year old twins (turned two 10/2). They were great sleepers--good bedtime routine, went down around 745pm, and fell asleep by 8/815 most nights. This has been going on since they were 11 months or so, with some hicciups and changes. They used to take a nap from 11-1, but starting in November their nanny noticed they were playing in their crib until about 1230/1, so she changed their naps to 1230. they know sleep until about 230-3pm, sometimes even later. As a result, or maybe it was the time change, it all happened at the same time, their sleep is all messed up and its progressively getting worse. They still have the same routine bedtime, but they are not falling asleep. Last night my daughter was up until 11. I've been coming in more and more and holding her hand in a desperate bid to get them to sleep at a more reasonable hour but nothing helps. I don't really want to move their bedtime to later, but I don't know what to do. Note, as a result of this, they are sleeping a bit later until 730/8am but never later than that, and as a result I don't think they are getting enough sleep. I have tried an early bedtime, (730) but that didn't help.
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Katie P.
Hi Catalina. If they are sleeping 2 to 2.5 hours, they likely won't be ready for bed until 8:30 so I would either cap the nap after 1.5 hours or move bedtime later. I like your nap at 12:30 so I would keep it there! |
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Catalina Hmmm...but Millie's is fighting sleep until much later than 8:30....so is there anything I can do to facilitate the falling asleep process? |
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Katie P.
Make sure they are getting enough physical activity during the day! They should have 30-60 minutes of physical activity around 10:00 and again around 3:00 or 4:00. Ideally this is outside (unless it's dangerously hot or cold) but it can be inside with tag, hide & seek, etc. Also, using a sleep clock can be a great way to give them independence with their sleep. I recommend the Kids Sleep Classic. You can tell Millie that, even if she isn't going to sleep, she still needs to lay in bed quietly. |
Hi Katie,
We are going through a bit of a rough patch with our 12 month old. She has some new teeth coming through, so it has been affecting both her day and night sleep. Now that the tooth has popped through, I am not sure what the issue is. She has been skipping naps this week, on and off, even though she still seems tired and cranky. I know that it is possible to have a transition to one nap around this age, but it doesn't seem like she is ready for that yet. She also learning to walk, and we have been taking her to many parties for the holidays, so maybe it just the overexcitement entire affecting her? Any suggestions? Trying to get her back on track (two naps) Thank you!
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Katie P.
Hi Maria. Here is my article on switching to 1 nap just as an FYI: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/article-02/ |
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Maria So helpful, thank you! |
Hi Katie I have a couple questions...
1-My just turned 6 month old has been taking great naps until about 2 weeks ago. She sleeps 7-7 without waking and was napping 8:30/9 for 1-1.5 hours, 11:30/12 for 1.5-2 hrs and cat nap around 4. This became about 30 min than lots of crying and fussing. During this time she also got a cold. The last 2 days she seems to be be back to normal but not sure if her schedule needs to change or if it was just the cold.
2- how long should she be awake for, age still seems best at 1.5-2hrs before nap.
3-she sleeps in the Merlin. How do you suggest transitioning and when?
Thank you
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Katie P.
Hi Charissa. I would recommend dropping the merlin at this point or it can become a sleep habit for her. As far as her schedule, most 6 month old babies are ready for 2 naps and need around 2.5 to 3 hours of awake time. An ideal schedule is generally 7:00 wake up, 9:30 - 11:00 nap, 2:00 - 3:30 nap and 7:00 bedtime. |
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Charissa Great thank you! If she usually nurses at 2 how would you schedule nap/ feeding? |
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Katie P.
7:00 wake up |
Hello,
My 12 week old mostly takes 30 minute naps during the day when we try to swaddle and put him in bassinet to sleep- he will take longer naps only if he is in the baby Bjorn or stroller. I am trying to put him down 1.5-2 hours after last waking, having him go down asleep but drowsy, simulating bedtime with white noise/lullabies/swaddle, but we can't break the 30 minute sleep cycle. I am hoping to improve this before he starts daycare. Any tips to lengthen naps? Thanks!
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Katie P.
Hi Tamara. It looks like you are doing some wonderful things. There are some babies who are not ready to consolidate their daytime sleep until they are 4-6 months old - no matter what you do. It sounds like your little guy might be one because your awake time and routine all look great. These are two strategies to help extend the nap. First, try going in as soon as he wakes and coax him back to sleep. If that doesn't work after 2-3 days, switch your strategy to leaving him for 10-15 minutes after he wakes for him to try to put himself back to sleep. If neither of those work, take a deep breath and know that you are doing everything you can to develop healthy sleep habits but he might just need a little more time. |
My 4.5 month old has the most unpredictable sleep. Naps are either too long or too short or just right at various times of the day, each day. Her night wakings are totally random. Sometimes she'll sleep 8-4 and wake-up again 5:30-6...other days she'll have her first wake-up at 12 or 1 or 2. This can be with a nap from 4-5 or a catnap at 7. There's just no rhyme or reason - is this normal?
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Katie P.
Hi Merle. This is normal for a newborn but not necessarily for a 4.5 month old. It's likely that your little girl is relying on sleep props to fall asleep. A sleep prop is anything external a baby uses to fall asleep and stay asleep. This can be nursing, bottle, rocking, bouncing, or even patting her bottom. When are little one's rely on props to fall asleep, they have a hard time taking full naps and also sleeping through the night. In order to get her on a consistent sleeping pattern, you will want to work on putting her down 100% wide awake during all sleeping situations. If you need help getting rid of the props, I'd be happy to discuss it with you during a free 15 minute evaluation: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
Hi Katie! My son is 13 months and we sleep trained him around 8 months so he goes down for naps without a problem and sleeps through the night. He typically wakes up between 5:30 and 6am and goes down for his first nap from 8am-10am and second nap around 2pm for 1-1.5 hours. Bedtime is around 6:30/7pm.
All of that works well, except when he wakes up at 6:30/7am. I love when he "sleeps in" but then his second nap gets messed up. His first nap gets pushed from 9-11am and then his second nap almost never happens. I try to put him down closer to 3pm but he just screams or plays for awhile but doesn't sleep. Then he seems super tired in the evening and we put him down earlier for bedtime.
Any thoughts on how we can get him to still take his second nap? Should we wake him early from his first nap or maybe push his first nap later and have him take one big nap?
Thank you!
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Katie P.
Hi Becky! It's likely he is getting ready for the 1 nap transition! Here is an article to help with this change: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/article-02/ In general, you will want to push his first nap later and then do an early bedtime :) |
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Becky I would love it if that is the case. Thank you! |
My 14 month old has been waking up between 5-6 am every morning for the past couple of months. Desired wake up is 7am. His bedtime is 7-7:30pm, and he goes to sleep fine on his own in his crib. He typically wakes 1 or 2 times per night but goes right back to sleep, either on his own or with a quick visit (less than 30s) to replace his pacifier. But at 5:30am, the only way to keep him quiet is to put him in bed with us. Sometimes he passes out again immediately, but he often sleeps fitfully with lots of moving/crying/waking until 7am.
He is between 1-2 naps per day. He usually goes down around 11:30 or 12 and sleeps for 1-2 hours. Occasionally, he goes down for a nap earlier in the morning (10 or 10:30). If he naps an hour or less, we will try to get him down again around 3:30-4, but the second nap isn't always successful.
Some quick comments about the pacifier: he is an addict and will happily have it in his mouth most of the time if given the option, but he does well without it during the day (as long as he doesn't see it). It is definitely part of the nap and bedtime routine, and it's difficult to get him down without it (unless he occasionally falls asleep while still being held for his bedtime story). It's remarkably effective during the day and even at night (except early morning), but I'm wondering if it's part of the problem at this point.
My questions are:
1. How do we keep him quiet in his crib until 7am?
2. How can we eliminate the 1-2 wake-ups per night?
3. Is the pacifier helping or hurting?
Thank-you!
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Katie P.
Hi Robin. Thanks for posting! I see early morning wakings quite often when babies are ready to transition to 1 nap. Here is an article to help with this transition: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/article-02/ |
Thank you for your expertise, Katie!
Our almost-5 month old has always been a catnapper (30 minutes). Maybe once a week, her first nap will be ~1 hour+. She sleeps in a dark nursery in her Magic Merlin with white noise.
1) Will her naps ever get longer? I've been leaving her in the crib for 15 minutes after she wakes up, but she gets pretty mad...
2) I don't keep her awake for more than 2 hours - this works well. But, I'd like to move her to a "by the clock" schedule for naps, because I'm going back to work soon. I'm nervous to stretch her wakeful periods (and risking overtiredness) if she's only having catnaps. Any advice?
The good news: she sleeps through the night and didn't have a 4 month sleep regression... so if this is the trade off, I guess we'll take it.
Many thanks :)
Meghan
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Katie P.
Hi Meghan! Does she have a naptime routine? What has to happen at naps in order for her to fall asleep? |
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Meghan Hi - we change her diaper, put her in the Merlin, get white noise going, and sing while lightly bouncing on an exercise ball. She's able to put herself to sleep drowsy, but awake - she just can't make it past 30 minutes. |
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Katie P.
I would work on putting her down completely awake. Drowsy at this stage is likely your problem. She is waking after 30 minutes needing you to get her drowsy again. Everything else looks perfect! Don't settle for short naps - there is always an option :) If you take away the drowsy part and still aren't noticing improvement, I'd be happy to discuss it further with you during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
My 10 month old has been sleeping through the night since she's been 3 months old.
For the last 8 weeks, her wake up time in the mornings has been getting earlier and earlier. She used to sleep until 7 a.m. Now it's anywhere between 4:15 and 5:30!
What's happened??
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Katie P.
Hi Danielle. What does her schedule during the day look like? It's possible she is getting too much daytime sleep. Also, what does her bedtime routine consist of? |
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Danielle Hi! |
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Danielle Her routine is the same every night. A solid food dinner, pjs, calming story time and a bottle in my arms. I place her in her crib in her room and not a peep until 4:15-5:30. |
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Katie P.
The time for the Q&A is over Danielle. If you'd like to speak more about your little one and learn some ways that I can help, I'd be happy to discuss it with you during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
Hello! My 27-month-old has always been a terrible sleeper. He was still waking up 4-6 times per night at one-and-a-half years old. These days he's still waking up almost every night - typically 2-3 times per night. He cries for us to come get him. We've tried everything: ignoring him, doing the gentle CIO method, sitting by his crib, bringing him in our room etc. None of these methods have worked, even when we've done them for months on end for consistency. We have a bedtime routine we follow and put him to bed at the same time every night. Suggestions? I'm losing my mind ... especially now that we also have a 4-month-old.
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Katie P.
Hi Erin. I'm happy to help get your toddler on a great sleeping track. What is your schedule? Do you have a bedtime routine? If so, what is involved? |
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Erin I think I missed the end of the session, but if you happen to see this and can offer help offline (I'll pay for good help!) let me know. We eat dinner at 7:15-7:30, and then pajamas at 8:10, books from 8:15-8:30, then it's lights out. (We're on a later dinner schedule because my husband and I both work full-time in the city.) |
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Katie P.
Hi Erin. Let's schedule a free 15 minute evaluation call. During this call, you can tell me more about your toddler and then we can talk about some additional options for support. Here is the link to book a call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
My 7 month old daughter has never stuck to a consistent nap schedule and I'm afraid it's now affecting her (previously successful) night time sleep. She was pretty consistent about napping/eating/playing in a 3 hour cycle with 1-2 dream feeds until she was about 3.5 months old and started easily sleeping through the night (7pm-6:30am). At that point her daytime routine suddenly fell apart and her naps were all over the place even though she continued to sleep through the night. Then, last month, she started waking in the night at odd hours, crying for anywhere from 5-40 minutes and sometimes waking for the day 5:30am. Since then we have tried to encourage a consistent nap schedule (one at 9am, 1pm and maybe a short one at 5pm) to hopefully get her night sleep back to normal. However, she will not cooperate! Even if I can push her first nap until 9am she often won't make it until 1pm for the next one and the length of these naps varies daily. Is there anything we can/should do to get her day time sleep more consistent so that hopefully she will go back to sleeping through the night?
Thanks for your help!
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Katie P.
Hi Emily. Does she have a bedtime and naptime routine? What has to happen at night and naps in order for her to fall asleep? |
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emily Hi Katie, |
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Katie P.
Drowsy but awake is typically trouble at this age so I would work on putting her down 100% wide awake during all sleep situations. Adjust your bedtime routine to a bottle, bath, song & story to help make sure she stays awake. As far as a schedule, I would push her to a 2 nap schedule with napping at 9:30 and 1:30. If her naps are short, do an early bedtime of 6:00! If you need help with this process, I'm happy to discuss some further options with you during a free 15 minute evaluation: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
We have a 1 month old. During the day he naps only if held or carried in a wrap/car. During the night he still feeds every 2-3 hours and after 3 am he doesn't go back to sleep in the cradle. We tried eat (nurse) play sleep but it isn't working. We also tried sleep shortly after nursing but he has a lot of reflux. Help! Thank you!
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Katie P.
Hi P. Congrats on your little guy! At this stage of the game, we can't do sleep training but we can start teaching healthy sleep habits. The best place to start is by continuing to do (or try to do) eat-play-sleep. Also, realize that newborns have a very small awake window. He should only be awake for 45 minutes before you try to get him to take another nap. Definitely speak with your pediatrician about his reflux because he/she can provide you some tips in that direction. If you'd like to discuss more about teaching your newborn healthy sleep habits throughout a 3 week period, I'm happy to discuss it with you during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
My son who recently turned 3 transitioned to a bed from crib about a month ago and has continuously been waking up 1-2x/night and coming into our room. He will typically go back to sleep if we lay in bed for a bit with him but I'm not sure why he's waking. The worst part is getting him to bed. He wants us to lay with him until he falls asleep and gets out of bed otherwise. we just started to leave him in there and continue to put him back until he finally stays. He used to go to bed so easily in the crib and sleep throughout the night, so this is all new for us. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
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Katie P.
Hi Beth. The transition to the bed can be a rough one. He's waking for you guys to come lay with him because he can and it's working! Who wouldn't want quality one on one time with mom or dad at bedtime and in the middle of the night? The best way past this is to make sure you have clear rewards and consequences. Using a sleep clock such as the Kids Sleep Classic can also be very helpful in teaching him when it's okay to get out of bed. Try a few of those strategies and if you are still struggling in a week or so, I'd be happy to discuss a toddler sleep plan with you during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
My (about to turn) 3 year old has always been an excellent sleeper. Since she was about 2.5 she has slept 8-7am (early morning wake ups were solved by a toddler clock). She still naps very well (1-3pm each day) and is crabby if she misses her nap. But in the last few months she has started fighting sleep at night. She has the same routine every evening, happily kisses us goodnight and then promptly begins every stall tactic imaginable as soon as the door closes. If we go in she makes up reasons to talk to us or for us to get her things. If we ignore her she will whine and cry for up to an hour. Does this mean it might be time for her to drop her nap or could it just be a phase? We have mostly been ignoring her since we know she doesn't need anything but I hate to leave her in there if we are asking too much with the naps and an 8pm bedtime. Please advise. Thanks!
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Katie P.
Hi Emily. It's likely that she is getting close to dropping a nap. At this point, you have a choice of moving bedtime back to 8:30 (or even 9:00) or capping the nap at 1.5 hours. I would personally recommend moving bedtime back first to see if that helps with the issue. |
Hi Katie, thanks in advance for your help! My son (an 18 lb baby who loves to eat!) is almost 7 months and we have been sleep training him for about 3.5 weeks now. We have gotten to a point where he puts himself to sleep after being put down awake for bedtime and all naps. Sometimes he will quietly put himself to sleep and sometimes he will still cry, but usually for less than 10 minutes, but I still hate that he is crying. He goes to bed around 6:30pm and wakes up between 5 and 5:45am. I had been making him stay in his crib until at least 6, but our target wake-up is 7am, so recently, I have decided to feed him when he wakes and then put him back down (awake) and he will sleep until 7ish. For now, I am ok doing this, as he is starving when he wakes up, but when is it reasonable to expect him to eat around 6pm and then not again until 7am? Or is that never reasonable? For naps, he has largely moved to two naps per day with one being about 2 to 2.5 hours after he wakes and then 3 or so hours after he wakes from that nap. What is the optimal nap schedule for this age? Generally, he will do 1.5 hours in the morning and 2 plus in the afternoon. But if one nap is considerably shorter, he might be up from his second nap around 2 or 2:30 and then we have a tough time making it to 6:30pm. When that happens, should we try to fit in another nap? And once we get to a solid two nap per day schedule, how will long will we want to maintain that schedule before the naps will change? Thanks so much!
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Laura Let me revise that...sometimes he puts himself to sleep with no crying, but tonight, he has cried for a good 30 minutes so far and is still not asleep. And this is angry crying. I checked on him to make sure he did not have a messy diaper, and he doesn't. I dont understand why after this long with sleep training, he is still crying so much to put himself to sleep some of the time. And it breaks my heart! |
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Katie P.
Hi Laura. It's possible he is getting too much daytime sleep. A baby this age needs 3 - 3.5 hours of daytime sleep, never having a nap over 2 hours. If he does, he won't be tired enough for bedtime or not tired enough to sleep his full 11-12 hours. For his age and weight, he should be able to go 11-12 hours without eating in the middle of the night. Early morning wakings can linger for 4-6 weeks so I would go back to cutting out the feed, having a minimum wake up time, and giving it more time for him to connect that last sleep cycle. |
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Laura Hi Katie, I think he is generally around 3.5 hours of daytime sleep per day. His longest naps might be 2.5 hours, but that might happen once a week. If he is on the 11 end of the 11-12 range, and he goes to bed at 6:30pm, then it makes sense that he is waking at 5:30am. So would you recommend moving his bedtime later? For 11 hours of sleep, he would need to go to bed at 8pm to get up at 7am, which seems really late for him. But for a 9 or 9:30am nap, he would need to get up at 7 to make it to nap time. And he needs to be napping at 9 or 9:30 because we have to take his sister to school at 8:30. Thanks. |
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Katie P.
Regardless on what time he wakes in the morning, I would not put him down any earlier than 9:00. Make sure he isn't getting tired or falling asleep in the car while bringing his sister to school. I would recommend taking your 5 am feed back out or you will soon notice it moves to 4:00 am, then 3:00 am, etc. Always have a minimum wake up time. If he is going to bed at 6:30, 6:00 would be a good minimum wake up time. Try pushing that second nap closer to 1:30 or 2:00 so he can make it to a little later of a bedtime. |
The last couple of weeks my 9mo old has been waking up and staying awake for a couple of hours in the middle of the night. He's never been easy to settle, but it seems to be worse than ever. He goes to bed around 7pm and I nurse to sleep but he wakes up and cries multiple time before finally staying asleep so he's not actually in bed until 8 or 8:30, sometimes later (absolutely will to go to sleep by himself). Now the same thing is happening during this 'midnight waking' (previously used to fall asleep easier during the night). He looks like he's asleep but the second I move he opens his eyes and screams when I lay him down, often rolling over and getting into crawling position or sitting up. He's now waking up later in the morning too, pushing naps later yet still getting tired at the same time in the evening. I tried extending his bedtime, but it's exhausting and stressful for both of us cos he's miserable by that time of day. What's causing these night wakings and how do I eliminate them?
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Katie P.
Hi Rosanna. I'm sorry for the delay in response. It sounds like your little guy is relying on a nursing sleep prop. A sleep prop is anything external a baby uses to fall asleep and stay asleep. When they rely on a prop and wake in the middle of the night, they need that prop replaced or have no idea how to fall back asleep. In some cases, they wake themselves up enough that they have trouble falling back asleep by the time the prop is replaced. In order to eliminate the night wakings, you will want to put your little guy down in his crib 100% wide awake so he can learn his own self-soothing skills. Move nursing to the first part of the bedtime routine. If you need help eliminating these props, I'd be happy to speak with you about some ways I can help during a free 15 minute evaluation call: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
My son is turning two on Saturday. He has always been a bad sleeper, but has generally gotten slightly better with age. He'll often cry out randomly through the light then immediately roll over and fall asleep. In the past year or so he has started waking up between 12-5 am and stay awake 1-2hrs. He's mostly keep to himself - singing songs, talking, etc, only occasionally calling for us or needing intervention. The intervention times are hard, but more so it's that he's exhausted the next morning when we wake him for daycare. Secondly, I'm due in March and he'll be sharing a room with the baby - we're terrified of him waking her nightly with this! He's still in the crib (& likes it), bed around 7:30, and napping 1/day for 1.5-3hrs. And thoughts/advice are appreciated!!
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Katie P.
Hi Stacey. What time is his nap? What does your bedtime routine look like? |
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Stacey His nap is at 12:30 or so daily -- this is the nap time for his class, but when he tends to be read for a nap regardless. At school he usually sleeps 1-2 hours, at home its usually 1.5-3 hours. We never let him sleep past 330, though thats rarely an issue. Bedtime routine has been the same since he was about 4 months, though times have changed over time - 5:30/6 Dinner and bottle, 6:30 Bath/potty/brush (not a bath every night), 7 reading, 7:30ish bedtime. He's great going to sleep - never any problem there. Sometimes he stays awake quietly for a bit (maybe 10-15 minutes) before falling asleep but no tears (except when we have to stop reading). He sleeps with a teddy, a stuffed excavator, and his ba-beep (blanket). Still sleeps with a paci though usually only uses it to fall asleep and then it falls out. We keep several in there so he doesn't have trouble finding another if he needs it at night. |
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Katie P.
Hi Stacey. It's likely that the pacifier could be your culprit. Even though he has many in there, once he wakes in the night, by the time he feels around to find it, he has woken himself up enough where he is having trouble going back to sleep. I see this very often at this age. I would work on eliminating the pacifier and that should solve those night parties he is having! |
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Stacey OK, we can certainly think about this, though usually when he is talking and singing and up during this time he has a paci either in his hand or his mouth. |
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Katie P.
Yes, that's common and often why parents don't think it's the problem. It's the part before this that is your culprit...when he wakes, instead of quickly sliding to the next cycle, he has to find the pacifier. By the time he finds it, he has woken himself up too much to easily go back to sleep. |
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Stacey Definitely willing to try it! Do you have recommendations on how to make that a smooth process for a 2 yo? I feel like the paci is the only thing that consistently helps him get to sleep and am scared of taking that away! |
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Katie P.
Unfortunately, there isn't a quick tip for getting rid of the pacifier at this age. I generally recommend cold turkey but there can be a lot of tears which is why this is exactly what I see in my private consults. I definitely can help you through the journey though if that is something that interests you. Here is a link to book a call with me to talk about the process: http://sleepwiseconsulting.com/free-15-minute-consultation/ |
My daughter goes to bed between 6:30-7pm and sleeps till 6ish am. I bring her into bed with me and she will sleep till 7:30-8am. Nap time is a 30 minute nap late morning and a longer nap anywhere from 45 minutes to 1.5 hours mid-afternoon. We tried cutting out the 3rd nap bc she was taking it late in the day (4-5pm) which was starting to interfere with bedtime. Sleeping takes place in her own room/crib, laying her down awake, wearing a sleep sack, sound machine, and pacifier. Now we are a bit thrown off. She has been waking up a lot. Usually replacing the pacifier does the trick. Naps have been thrown off too with her fighting/screaming/not sleeping for naps (use to be very easy). I am not entirely sure this is all due to teething. How does one get through teething and/or sleep regression at this stage?
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Katie P.
Hi Emily. I would begin with making her complete a full night of sleep in her crib - no more finishing the morning in your bed. This can be very confusing for babies and cause them to wake multiple times in the night, along with protesting napping, because they are looking to snuggle with mom. Next do 2 consistent nap times of 9:30 and 2:00/2:30 with bedtime 3.5 hours after she wakes from her last nap. |
Thank you, Katie! Sleep Wise Consulting offers a variety of sleep services for babies through elementary-aged children including a free 15-minute consultation. Check out Katie’s profile for more info!
